One facet of Christmas – suffering

Christmas – a good time to talk about suffering.
I personally think this holiday is for family, and it always brings me joy, with presents, and laughter. But it’s not always like that for everyone.
It’s the time for each of us to stop and think, to put ourselves in others’ shoes. There are many facets of Christmas that many people forget, including suffering.

When Jesus was born, there were three gifts brought to him by the Wise Men. I gotta say first, everybody should actually watch movies about Jesus was born in the manger, because they are awesome, and because Jesus being born is exactly the spirit of Christmas.

There were three gifts brought to Jesus by the Wise Men: Gold, Frankincense, Myrrh. Each of these has its own meaning. Gold states clearly that Jesus was a King, even at that time he was two years old. He is the King of all King, and is the King forever. The Wise Men gave him Gold, as saying that they obey this King, that Jesus would bring freedom and joy to his Kingdom, and that Jesus would rule his nation, and he was the God that the Jewish has always been waiting for. Secondly, frankincense is extremely valuable tree sap that is used only for special occasions. In church, people will pour frankincense on the priests to indicate that they are the connection between God and all his people. This shows that Jesus was a perfect priest, that he would soon guide the Israel so that they would be closer to God.

But the very special gift that made me stunned when knowing the real meaning, was Myrrh. Myrrh is a special spice that is put on dead bodies because it preserves the bodies and covered up with smell. Who would give such a thing on someone’s birthday? But when think about this, it will make a lot more sense when knowing that Jesus will sacrifice for his people, that he will die on the cross for all of us, and this is his mission coming to this world. He freed us from sins, and he guided us to know God the Father, for seeing Jesus himself means seeing the Almighty Father.

On his very early birthdays, the one thing was clear was that he will soon die. He will soon suffer. For people. So that we all will celebrate our reunion day with God. However, it seems that Christmas is not that fun for many people, that many of them are suffering from the loss of their loved one, the absence of family, or the distance between their family member.

It’s this time of the year that we all should also pray for those who do not rejoice.

For my family, we usually go to midnight church together and then throw a big party to celebrate Jesus’s birthday. Chicken soup and cookies. I remember one Christmas Eve received fortune cookies from church, and I gave them to a homeless person sitting in front of our church that night. Those fortune cookies I never got to eat every day because they were expensive, but I gave them anyway because I knew they would be special to someone else. That was me about five years ago. My family also goes watch a play hosted by Sunday’s school’s kids, that they will become Mary, Joseph, Jesus, angels, sheep, and many other characters that I love in the Bible. I have been an angel once. It was fun, but it was frustrated for an introvert like me! I was shy because my parents were looking at me, which was funny because they were supposed to be there to support me haha. What else do we usually do? My Dad and I will sometimes choose to go to different churches to see how they organize their Christmas Eve masses, and most of them celebrate it in a truly special way! If any of my friends asks me to hang out with them on the 24th or 25th of December, I will clearly say that I am not available, because I have a great family to be with.

But this year, do I, though? This evening, my mom texted me Merry Christmas while I was thinking real hard about where to go for Christmas Eve mass. I don’t know where, because no matter what, I will know no one there. I know this birthday is for Jesus, so I need to only care about me and him only, but I still concern whom to go with, and definitely no one. Fortunately, I asked my roommate and she said yes.

I wonder how much my parents are missing me. I bet a lot. I love the feeling of Christmas in a hot and humid atmosphere, that I didn’t get to wear such a cozy sweater. But does it matter, though, because being beautiful in a dress is also pretty cool!

I would say that I do not suffer much this Christmas, as the meaning of suffering to me seems to be so much bigger than receiving a text from Mom. instead of a hug.

People are loosing their family. People are loosing their hopes. They are loosing their faith as well. I want to pray that for this season, those who reunion with their big God’s family will also be praying for those who do not, for those who find no worthy in God to start believing again, since this is the family they should turn back to, since this is the family always welcome them.

I have had not a great birthday party today, but I am still joyful, because I know there will be priceless gifts for me, as well as for others.

Fragments

Kintsugi – the art of precious scars



As such a perfectionist, I usually aim for wholeness, without actually perceiving the beauty of being broken. That these pieces fallen apart are what make the story of my life. 

Good night, because the day is almost over. You and I. Broken but still – beautiful.