30 day challenge — Day 2

An unexpected event

It was a rainy day. We walked alongside. She held her hand above my head, trying to cover me from the rain. I knew things like these were what she would do, because it’s her.

An unexpected event

I had learned to give thanks more often. It’s harder to do that with my family. I don’t know why. It just seems really strange. The easiest people to say thanks to are people I hardly know. Sometimes I expect much from those close to me that I stop feeling grateful for small things they do. So the biggest challenge is to give thanks for even just simple acts of kindness.

An unexpected event

But giving thanks is much easier than admitting I’m wrong in many situations and apologizing. Among days when I lied to my parents and got punished, I remember most that one afternoon, when my dad got so angry that he even said, “I don’t trust you anymore,” and the thought in me that I should have said sorry was so strong that it bursted into unorganized sentences. Words collided. I was so awkward that I stuttered. But dad’s face changed slightly. He stood up and left. I knew he was proud of me.

An unexpected event

I think apologies are the hardest to say, simply because in order to say them sincerely, you have to admit your weaknesses and admit that you are wrong first. In many cases, I feel uneasy inside for my wrongdoings, but because of my pride I skip the sorry part, allowing myself to think everything is still fine without them.

An unexpected event

She is kind to me, like always. But I haven’t been so to her. I realized that, a long, long time ago. But I always give excuses for not saying what I think. I thought about it so so much that it becomes unnatural. And despite how much I wanted to apologize, I forgot the most important part: meeting up with her.

An unexpected event

And it’s on those rainy days that the words came out. Unexpectedly. After all, her kindness deserves something better that how I treated her, and that I can control. I can do it better, and at that moment I decided I would do it better. Starting with an apology for what I have done. No script. Just words colliding.

Published by Thi Le

Human.

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