remorse

“When he saw you, he saw himself. And his guilt. You are still angry and I realize it is far too early to expect you to accept this, but maybe someday you will see that when your father was hard in you, he was also being hard on himself. Your father, like you, was a tortured soul, Amir jan.

I cannot describe to you the depth and blackness of the sorrow that came over me when I learned of his passing. I loved him because he was my friend, but also because he was a good man, maybe even a great man. And this is what I want you to understand, that good, real good, was born out of your father’s remorse. I think everything he did, feeding the poor on the streets, building an orphanage, giving money to friends in need, it was all his way of redeeming himself.

And that, I believe, is what true redemption is, Amir jan, when guilt leads to good.

I know that in the end, God will forgive. He will forgive your father, me, and you too. I hope you can do the same. Forgive your father if you can. Forgive me if you wish. But, most important, forgive yourself.”

From The Kite Runner.

The letter from Rahim Khan to Amir jan.

The letter that frees my tears, at last, after 300 pages of sorrow.

Published by Thi Le

Human.

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