Being that “odd” – in quotation mark not because it has a different meaning, but because it is simply different.

(Other perspectives) An odd starts its journey. 

I am too used to being an odd that I gradually forget how to blend in. 

And sometimes the Devil in me say because I’m too weak that I try to be a different kind. 

I have never bothered. But oftentimes I would stop and ask why never had my choice been chosen also by someone else. Why never had my thoughts been understood by another odd. 

I have met people who love me just because I am who I am. But I also have encountered those who say, “It is beautiful the way it is,” just to stop me from pursuing more, from satisfying my own desires. The changes on a person’s face when I say what I want to do remind me every time to be secretive about what I love, so that I can prevent other people from discouraging me. 

It is hard to find someone that truly understands. Before, I thought seeing more of the world will give way to more opportunities for me to meet “the odds” that know me by souls. People are, as lovely and caring as I have always hoped, but on the other hand they push me more towards the people I have known for long. They help me understand that there is no place for greedy, that leaving a place doesn’t mean I am capable of leaving the people and the culture. 

Becoming that “odd”, I know how to appreciate what should be appreciated. I know for the sack of life that blending in is important because without it, I live by myself. I did. Everyday I do my best to aquire skills that I believe will get me towards where I want to be, but other days I will let myself be lazy and read a book and stay far from the center of the world. 

I talked to one of the odds today. She, I believe, is no longer the “she” that I have always loved – as a friend. The odd asked me to hang out, and it made my day. 

After all, she loves me the way I am, but I never learn to love her as I used to. What she is doing offends me as a friend, but I never speak up. 

But for I am an odd, 

I know what she feels. 

We, after all, need a friend who understand, not a teacher. 

Published by

Thi Le

A Vietnamese. An international student in the States. Born a reader and a learner. A writer by will. Recharge in solitude. Aim to grow horizontally and vertically, but not physically. Welcome to my naked world. Hope my words inspire you in some ways, help you know me more and maybe yourselves, even.

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