Two ways – Thanksgiving

(Other perspectives) Let’s go. 

Time stops – time flies. 

I woke up without feeling if I have even slept, remembering exactly what happened in the dream. 

The beach. Sister-in-law. Film camera. 
“You have to truly love it before buying a new camera and having a new hobby like photography,” she said. 

I really want to buy a camera, because I have seen many beautiful scenes but solely because of my low-quality phone camera, I couldn’t keep those beautiful places in photos. But the price is unaffordable. 

At least I had that happiness in my dream when I got to touch it and tried it out. Waking up without any alarm, 8:00 AM, I knew I was back in reality. Common App fee, CSS fee, ACT and TOEFL score reports fee. What do I do with all this? I would work extra, but how much extra to cover all these… 

I am in the middle – waiting for my 18 and not. Not because I have always thought that I would be independent as much as possible from my parents. Yes, I am waiting for it because I know when I am 18, I get to work, not only in here but also in Vietnam, where people can only work when they are over 18. 

The price. It teaches me to love what my parents do. It teaches me to appreciate their love. I have never actually told them, but I love them and miss them. This is Thanksgiving, and I’m staying at someone else’s place. 

Again, the price. And the applications. How much am I missing out from the world? 

I don’t know who to blame, because there is no one but my emotions are enemies. He asked why didn’t I pay my full attention on him when we get a chance to talk. I don’t know. Because I am scared that every moment I don’t work, don’t study, my future would be a blank space. 

But it would be scarier and truly blank when there is no one there. At the end of the tunnel, light doesn’t come from nowhere. It’s from the people whom I love and who love me. 

Two ways. All these relationships would end if I stop trying. 

Two ways. But if I am stuck on this lane of the road trying to pass a huge pile of deadlines, how am I supposed to cross to the other one to see my beloved friends and family. 

Two ways. I am not moving. 

I am trying, but my mind keep reminding me of what I need to do. 

What I need?

Maybe a good nigh of sleep. 

And a sense of thankfulness. 

Happy Thanksgiving. 

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